LINK GOES OUT TO BUY PIZZA AND NEVER GETS BACK
by thisisamasterpiece
Summary: ...Or not.
1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1: WARIO RIDES OF THE EDGE OF NINTENDO CITY

Link promised everyone that he'd buy Pizza. He went out into Nintendo City in his Hippie Van. It was about 7 at night, and almost everybody was looking forward to staying up for the whole night long. Kirby was stuck in the chimney with a Santa Claus hat on. Mario was stuck in the dishwasher. Luigi was staring at the dishwasher for 5 minutes, until he decided to get his newspaper and hit Pichu with it. Pichu ran away and Luigi's face turned red as he ran after him. Captain Falcon was having A Tea Party with Princess Peach. He was wearing a pink tutu and a bra.

"SHOW ME YOUR BOOBS!" Yelled Captain Falcon. Peach threw old sweat tea at Captain Falcon. Captain Falcon used perfume.

"IT'S SUPER EFFECTIVE." Yelled Captain Falcon as he sprayed his perfume.

"It kinda smells like smoke." Said Peach awkwardly.

The Fire Detector went off, but Luigi ran in and killed it with his newspaper. He was now chasing Pichu, Ness and Olimar around the Mansion. Olimar used his built-in space suit commode.

"WHAT DID I DO? WHAT DID I DO?" Yelled Ness.

"LUIGI YOU'RE SO MEAN." Said Pichu.

Wario was riding his Motorcycle around the mansion behind them and broke everything.

Pichu, Olimar and Ness locked themselves in a bedroom, but Luigi came storming in anyway. Pichu whimpered and held on to the bed for his life.

"YOU KNOW, THERE IS ANOTHER WAY OUT." Said Luigi. He began to violently pull Pichu off the bed with Olimar and Ness laughing for some reason.

"NOOOOO!" Yelled Pichu. "I DON'T WANT TO DIE!"

Luigi finally pulled Pichu off the bed, then bumped into the wall. Then Pichu electrocuted Luigi.

"OOH. NOW YOU'RE GETTING IT." Said Luigi.

He went back into his room and came back with a newspaper, then hit Pichu so hard with it, he started crying.

When Luigi left, Pichu was still crying but Ness and Olimar couldn't stop laughing. Luigi was now reading his newspaper, but still heard them.

"Well I don't think it's funny worth a darn." Said Luigi.

Meanwhile, Wario was riding his motorcycle around until he smashed into the dishwasher, causing it to open and freeing Mario.

Mario put on a Santa Claus hat and ran out to the Toaster. Then dumped 30 year's worth of Toast into the best Toaster in the world. Zelda walked into the kitchen.

"Mario? What exactly are you doing?" Asked Zelda.

"I'm-a-going to make Toast for everybody." Replied Mario.

"Oh, joy. How thoughtful of you." Said Zelda.

*SNIFF SNIFF* "It kinda smells like smoke in here." Observed Mario.

Suddenly, the Toaster exploded and 30 year's worth of TOASTED TOAST went flying everywhere.

*SNIFF SNIFF* " Could somebody please get me out of here. I'm hungry." Said Kirby, still stuck in the chimney.

Wario was still on his motorcycle and ran off the edge of Nintendo City.


	2. KIRBY ISN'T STUCK IN THE CHIMNEY ANYMORE

Chapter 2: KIRBY ISN'T STUCK IN THE CHIMNEY ANYMORE AND NOTHING MAKES SENSE ANYMORE.

"Where's-a-Link? It's-a-been 1 hour and 5 minutes since he took off in his hippie van." Asked Mario

"I don't know. Maybe he went to one of those fancy Pizza Places that take 30 years to make their pizzas." Said Ness.

Everybody stared at Ness for 5 minutes.

"Not really..." Marth said awkwardly.

"LETS BAKE COOKIES!" Said Peach.

"OH BOY! I'VE ALWAYS WANTED TO BAKE COOKIES." Said Captain Falcon. He put on a pretty pink apron.

Mario began to stare at the dishwasher.

"Okay. First, we need ICE CREAM." Said Peach.

Captain Falcon put on a Santa Claus hat on and ran to the freezer. Yoshi was stuck in the freezer covered in ice cream. Captain Falcon pulled Yoshi out of the freezer, threw him in a laundry hamper, and dumped him into Peach's Mixing Bowl.

Peach stared at it for 5 minutes. IT ALREADY LOOKED LIKE GRANDMOTHER USED TO MAKE.

"Yummy! Okay, now we need Thirty Kilograms of Cotton Candy!" Said Peach. Captain Falcon put his Santa Claus hat back on and ran around for 16 minutes in circles, then he ran to the chimney, drove his car up the chimney, then Kirby came flying out with his Santa Claus hat still on. Wario was in the night sky, riding his motorcycle TO THE MOON. Captain Falcon grabbed Kirby and went down the chimney like it was a warp pipe. He threw Kirby into the bowl.

Peach stared at the bowl for 5 minutes.

"THESE ARE GOING TO BE THE BEST COOKIES IN THE WORLD." Said Peach. "Now we need ONE SHINY NEW LAPTOP COMPUTER!" Ordered Peach.

Captain Falcon walked up to Jigglypuff and stole her precious new 2010 LAPTOP COMPUTER. Jigglypuff threw Captain Falcon into the mixing bowl and took her laptop back. She noticed it said "ERROR. NO IMPUT." In Capital, Red letters.

"OH NO! THE COMPUTER IS DEAD." Said Jigglypuff. She threw her precious new 2010 laptop out the window and it smashed on the ground. "GOOD RIDDANCE."

"THESE COOKIES ARE GOING TO TASTE MORE PRECIOUS EVERY BITE." Said Peach "NOW I NEED THIRTY BATTERIES AND SIXTEEN GALLONS OF WATER."

Nobody was Peach's servant, anymore.

Peach stared at Mario staring at the dishwasher for 5 minutes.

Mario stared at Peach Staring at Mario for 5 more minutes.

Peach stared at Mario staring at Peach staring at Mario for 5 more minutes.

Mario quickly put his Santa Claus hat back on and ran to the den where Luigi was drinking 9,000 gallons of water and listening to his Radio.

Mario stole his precious "Bee Radio" because it was yellow and black and dumped out 67845 batteries and stole all the water he was drinking.

Luigi got up and began to read his newspaper. Mario ran back to the kitchen and dumped Luigi's head radio and Luigi's water into the mixing bowl.

*SNIFF SNIFF* "It smells lovely!" Said Peach, with tears of joy. Captain Falcon was starting to break.

"SH-0000000000W ME YOUR !" Yelled Captain Falcon.

Peach tasted her precious recipe. "HMMM...NEEDS MORE VINY-GER." Said Peach.

Mario poured vinegar on Peach and Peach threw herself into the bowl.

"Okay, Mario. Now get twelve cartons of FROOT LOOPS." Mario kicked the freezer and thirteen boxes of RAISIN BRAN fell on him.

"Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow." Said Mario. He dumped them all into the mixing bowl.

"THIS IS GOING TO TASTE SO GOOD." Said Peach. "Now, we need 1 ounce of sugar.

Mario dumped 200 pounds of sugar under his Santa Claus hat and threw himself into the Mixing Bowl. They all fell into the oven.

30 YEARS LATER...

Ness hit the Oven with his bat and the oven jammed. IT EXPLODED.

Yoshi, Kirby, Captain Falcon, Peach and Mario fell out of the oven and smelled like smoke.

"GUYS! I THINK THE COOKIES ARE READY." Said Kirby.

"OH BOY! OH BOY!" Said Captain Falcon excitedly.

Suddenly, Wario came storming in on his motorcycle and stole the cookies then flied out of the chimney and landed on top of the Empire State Building. EVER.


	3. Olimar Chases Wario Up To The Night Sky

Chapter 3: OLIMAR CHASES WARIO UP INTO THE NIGHT SKY

Computers no longer exist. Jigglypuff was very depressed. Suddenly, King Dedede rang the doorbell and Jigglypuff answered it. King Dedede was wearing a pink crown and a pink jacket. He was selling precious new 2010 LAPTOPS for the next 30 years.

"Well I would like 30 laptops, please." Said Jigglypuff.

"That will cost $180,001."

"Okay. Just wait 30 years."

Jigglypuff slammed the door in King Dedede's face and went to Olimar.

"Hey, Olimar. Doesn't Wario get on your nerves, sometimes?" Asked Jigglypuff.

"Yeah, sometimes, I wish he was dead to the world." Admitted Olimar.

"Then maybe you can give me $90,000.50 dollars and I'll take care of him." Said Jigglypuff.

"SURE." Said Olimar as he gave her $90,001. "KEEP THE CHANGE."

Jigglypuff ran to the top of The Empire State Building.

"Hey, Wario. Doesn't Olimar get on your nerves sometimes?"

"YES, HE DOES!" Said Wario.

"Give me $90,000.50 and I'll take care of him."

Wario gave Jigglypuff $90,000.50.

"Thank you."

Suddenly, Olimar came to The Empire State Building in his Rocket Ship and blasted Wario to The Night Sky and Wario still had his motorcycle. IT WAS THE ULTIMATE NIGHT SKY BATTLE. Wario continued to ride to the moon but Olimar kept running him over with his rocket ship.

So Jigglypuff went back and bought 30 NEW 2010 LAPTOPS from King Dedede. Jigglypuff went inside and couldn't get it to work. She threw it into the Laundry Chute and it Landed in Luigi's laundry. Kirby couldn't get his precious 2010 laptop computer to work, anyway. He threw it into the Sun and it was never seen again. Zelda got a 2008 computer and was very grumpy.

"2008 COMPUTERS ARE DEAD TO THE WORLD." Said Zelda. She threw it in the Air Vent and it landed on Captain Falcon.

Captain Falcon hated 2008 LAPTOPS. Captain Falcon threw it in the Air Vent and it landed on Pichu.

Pichu was not impressed. He threw it at Kirby and Kirby poured Punch on it, then ate it. Kirby didn't like Punch, so he decided to Flush it down the commode. The poor commode couldn't handle the monstrosity of the 2008 computer, so it clogged up.

"LUIGI! UNCLOG THIS COMMODE." Yelled Kirby.

Luigi walked up to the commode, picked it up, and threw it out the window. Then jumped out the window.

Sonic yelled "YOU'RE TOO SLOW." At his computer, then ran and bumped his head in the wall.

Snake threw his computer at The Eifel Tower and The Eifel Tower won the race.

Meta Knight crammed his computer into a Playstation 2 and threw it in the fireplace. "THE PLAYSTATION 2 CAN BURN IN HELL FOR ALL I CARE."

Mario crammed his 2011 LAPTOP into the Dishwasher and stared at it for 5 minutes, then threw the remains at Luigi. Luigi tried to watch The Ball Game on it, but the laptop died. Jigglypuff, who loves EVERYONE got out the fire extinguisher and sprayed the laptop with it, then buried it.

Meanwhile, Up in The Night Sky, Wario's motorcycle was destroyed by Olimar's Space Rocket and he was trying to make a run to Jupiter. Olimar's Space Rocket kept running into Wario, though.

Everyone's computer no longer existed. Reasons Include:

Ness throwing his 2002 computer at The Bakery.

Pichu bashing his keyboard and throwing his computer into the bath tub with Captain Falcon in it.

Captain Falcon using his Computer in the bathtub and pouring Shampoo and conditioner to make it look prettier.

Peach trying to bake her 2009 computer in her Mixing Bowl.

Jigglypuff was crawling around in the vent and found an old 1998 computer. She typed "JIGGLYPUFF!" on it and the computer ran out of battery. The screen went black, so she threw it in the Laundry Hamper, it landed in Nana's laundry.

THE NEXT DAY.

Luigi and Nana were wearing Computers. Jigglypuff was having a giggle fit because they looked like robots, especially Luigi, who was wearing his radio with long antennas.

Meanwhile, Wario finally made it to the moon. Olimar was still attacking him with his space rocket, though. They finally landed On The Empire State Building. Wario got out his motorcycle and ran Olimar over with it, but Olimar took them both up to the night sky, but this time, Wario ate Garlic so he turned into Super Wario, he knocked out Space Ship Olimar and they returned to the Empire State Building.

"GIVE ME BACK THE COOKIES." Said Olimar.

"I ALREADY ATE THEM, THOUGH :C." Admitted Wario.

Olimar went back to Nintendo City and Wario rode his motorcycle off the edge of The Empire State Building.


	4. NESS DRINKS A FACTORY OF MONSTER ENERGY

Chapter 4: JIGGLYPUFF GETS CHUBBY AND NESS DRINKS ONE FACTORY OF MONSTER ENERGY DRINK.

Mario was stuck in the dishwasher again. Kirby was stuck in the chimney with a Santa Claus hat on again. Captain Falcon was watching "Desperate Housewives" with Luigi, Zelda and Peach. Yoshi ate the fridge. Ness was drinking a whole factory of MONSTER ENERGY DRINK. Yoshi ate the fridge. Olimar was riding his Space Ship around The Night Sky.

"I'M-A-HUNGRY." Mario's annoying voice echoed around The Mansion.

Wario rode his motorcycle down the chimney, with Kirby falling out in The Fireplace where Meta Knight was throwing Twilight Books into. Wario ran into the dishwasher, freeing Mario. Wario stormed out of the door.

"WHERE'S LINK? IT'S BEEN 3 HOURS AND HE STILL HASN'T GOT THE PIZZA YET." Said Kirby, crying "I'M SO HUNGRY!"

Meanwhile, Link's Hippie Van was parked outside of The Nintendo City National Bank of Wario. A sign outside said "DO NOT USE BANK. GO UPSTAIRS. NEVER USE BANK. BANK DOES NOT EXIST." Link stared at the sign for almost 3 hours so far.

Anyway, Wario was drinking Slimfast in The National Bank of Wario, then rode his bike out the door and drove off the edge of all that does and doesn't exist.

Jigglypuff was eating as many sweets as she could, because Kirby asked if she "Lost weight". Sonic was racing the ceiling to Neverland. Sonic took off, but when he got to Neverland, the ceiling was already there. Snake decided he was too Socially awkward to the world, so he decided to hide in his Box for eternity. However, Jigglypuff mistaken it for a chocolate bar and ate it. Suddenly, the screen turned black except for a tiny square of green with an old man in it yelling "SNAKE? SNAKE? SNAKE!" With other sqaures randomly appearing, such as An African American Jet Pilot yelling in a plane, Carly from iCarly laughing next to an M'n'M statue, and a guy repeatedly getting hit in the groin by a lamppost. The Screen went pitch black for 5 minutes, then showed Carly turning on the TV and A Rainbow assortment of Infinity Spencers with their brooms on fire yelling "OHHHH MYYYYY GAWWWWWD."

Then the screen went back to normal, with Snake and his Box inside a chubby Jigglypuff. Then Peach walked up into the Kitchen to throw more stuff into her precious mixing bowl.

"Oh my, Jigglypuff. You've gotten rather...portly." Said Peach.

Yoshi immediately threw up the fridge he ate.

"OHBOYOHBOYOHBOY! YOU REALLY THINK SO?" Asked Jigglypuff.

"Sure..." Said Peach Awkwardly.

Jigglypuff stormed off to Kirby.

Meanwhile, Link had already bought plenty of delicious pizzas. He went off to Ganondorf's pub on his way back, though. He parked his Hippie Van outside the pub and saw Ganondorf as The Bartender.

"What could I get for you?" Asked Ganondorf.

"I'll have a drink." Said Link.

Wario was riding his motorcycle in The Night Sky, planning to go to the Moon, until he saw Space Ship Olimar on his way...

Chubby Jigglypuff tried to impress Kirby with her portliness. Kirby had hearts in his eyes.

"I think I'm in love with you." Said Kirby.

Jigglypuff smiled, but felt sick and threw up Snake and his box into Peach's mixing bowl.

"THANKS JIGGLYPUFF." Said Peach.

Meanwhile, Ness was storming around the mansion wearing NOTHING but a Santa Claus hat.

" CATCH ME IF YOU CAN, LUIGI."

Luigi, Zelda, Pichu, Mario, Yoshi, Nana, Popo and Marth were chasing him, all wearing Santa Claus hats. Luigi had a newspaper, and wasn't afraid to use it!

Meanwhile, Link was very drunk and told Ganondorf he loved him.

Wario was still Riding His motorcycle to the moon, and Olimar was still attacking him in his Space Rocket. Wario rode his Motorcycle off the edge of the universe, then came back up to the Moon and landed on it, but then rode off the edge of the Moon. Spaceship Olimar chasing Wario in The Night Sky.


	5. SPACESHIP OLIMAR WON'T GIVE UP

Chapter 5: PEACH IS A CANNIBAL AND SPACESHIP OLIMAR WON'T GIVE UP.

"WHAT WE NEED IS A CAKE!" Yelled Peach.

Captain Falcon quickly put on a pretty pink apron and a Santa Claus hat. Peach got out her precious Mixing Bowl.

"First, we need one blueberry." Said Peach, shaking her head.

Captain Falcon ran up to the ceiling and trapped Marth in a bag, then dumped him in Peach's Mixing Bowl.

Peach stared at The Mixing Bowl for 5 minutes and one second.

"IT'S THE BEST BLUEBERRY EVER!" Said Peach. "Now we need 28 pounds of Watermelon Trix Yogurt."

Captain Falcon hopped on one foot wearing 343485 Santa Claus hats and captured Yoshi, then threw him in the bowl.

Peach Stared at the bowl for 5 minutes.

"WHY, HOW LOVELY CAPTAIN FALCON!" Said Peach. "Now we need one dishwasher.'

Captain Falcon ran into his Blue Falcon ship and crashed into the dishwasher, then threw it into Peach's mixing Bowl.

Peach stared at it for 66 minutes and 34 second.

"WHY, THIS IS A MASTERPIECE!" Yelled An Excited Princess Peach.

"Get me one F-Zero racer."

Captain Falcon ran around the dishwasher for 30 minutes and put on 549739479237932 Santa Claus hats on and hid in the refrigerator.

Peach stared at the refrigerator for 30 days.

Captain Falcon did a barrel roll out of the refrigerator with frosting on and jumped into the Mixing Bowl.

Peach stared at the Mixing Bowl for 479 minutes.

"I LOVE IT!" Said Peach. "Now get me 9,000 pounds of COLD."

Peach hid in the Freezer for the next 6 years.

Suddenly, Mario fell through the ceiling and landed on 45 cartons of WHOPPERS.

Mario stared at the dishwasher for 5 minutes.

Peach stared at Mario staring at the dishwasher for 5 minutes.

Mario stared at Peach staring at Mario staring at the dishwasher for 5 minutes.

Peach stared at Mario staring at Peach staring at Mario staring at the dishwasher for 5 minutes.

Mario stared at Peach staring at Mario staring at Peach staring at Mario staring at the dishwasher for 5 minutes.

Mario quickly put on THE GRAND SANTA CLAUS HAT and jogged backwards then caught Nana and Popo then dumped them in Antarctica, left them there for 45 years, then picked them up in his truck and dumped them into Peach's mixing bowl.

Peach stared at the dishwasher for 5 minutes, then stared at her mixing bowl for 30 years.

"THESE COOKIES WILL BEAT GRANDMOTHER'S ANY DAY." Said Peach. "Now get me thirty eight lemons."

Mario ran to The Empire State Building, kicked it, ran into his Truck, then ran into Pichu with it then slammed him into the mixing bowl.

Peach stared at her Mixing Bowl for 5 minutes.

"I WILL ENJOY EVERY BITE OF THIS PRECIOUS RECIPE." Said Peach. "Now we need one pack of provolone." Demanded Peach.

Mario put on two GRAND SANTA CLAUS HATS and kidnapped Zelda, dipped her in Provolone, and SLAM DUNKED her into the mixing bowl.

Peach stared at the mixing bowl for 5 minutes.

"THIS WILL BE THE BEST CAKE IN THE WORLD!" Said Peach, with tears of joy. "Now we need one gram of frosting." Said Peach.

Mario spread 900 kilograms of frosting on his GRAND SANTA CLAUS HATS and threw himself into the mixing bowl.

Peach stared at the mixing bowl for 86 years and 5 minutes.

"I LOVE YOU, PRECIOUS CAKE." Said Peach. "Now we need 4 boxes of RAISIN BRAN." Jigglypuff threw a raisin at Peach and Peach threw herself into the mixing bowl, then they all fell into the oven.

5 minutes later...

Jigglypuff kicked the oven and left a dent in it, then Marth, Yoshi, Captain Falcon, Nana, Popo, Zelda, Pichu, Mario and Peach fell out of the oven. Suddenly, Wario came storming in and stole Peach's precious cake, then rode his motorcycle up the chimney, then fled towards the moon, with Space Ship Olimar chasing him. Kirby fell out of the chimney with his Santa Claus hat on again, this time it was PURPLE.

Meanwhile, Link was getting grumpy, so he decided to drive to back to the mansion and tell everyone off, until he heard a Police Car with "ILLEGAL" on the license plate.

Luigi was now the only one chasing SUPER HYPERACTIVE MONSTER ENERGY DRINK Ness. Ness was trapped at the end of the hallway, so Luigi smacked him with his newspaper forever.

Jigglypuff was getting jittery from all the candy she ate earlier, she was about to have a SUPER JIGGLYPUFF RUSH.

Up in The Night Sky, Spaceship Olimar was chasing Wario on his motorcycle and Wario ate TWO SERVINGS of fresh garlic, then TWO SERVINGS of SLIMFAST, then turned into...SUPER GARLIC BANKER WARIO, Then Blasted Spaceship Olimar into the sun, but that wasn't the last of Spaceship Olimar...


	6. SUPER JIGGLYPUFF THINK CLOTHES ARE EVIL

Chapter 6: JIGGLYPUFF TURNS INTO SUPER JIGGLYPUFF AND THINKS CLOTHES ARE EVIL.

Jigglypuff ate too much sugar. You know what happens when Jigglypuff consumes one sugar. SHE TURNS INTO SUPER JIGGLYPUFF. She ate 8,999 sugar, so she turned into THE ULTIMATE JIGGLYPUFF. Jigglypuff thinks clothes are evil. She watched Luigi watch Peach watch Captain Falcon watch The Dishwasher Washing Late Night Washing Drama Dishwasher Late Night Night Holiday Special Night Late Washing Dishwasher Night Night Night Holiday Billy Mays Drama Night Late Night Show. "BILLY MAYS! BILLY MAYS! DISHWASHER! BILLY MAYS! LATE NIGHT! DRAMA! BILLY MAYS! NIGHT! LATE! DISHWASHEEEERRRRS!" Suddenly, infinity dishwashers appeared on screen with Billy Mays getting stuck in each one. Mario was stuck in the dishwasher again, anyway. Jigglypuff was flabbergasted. EVERYONE was wearing clothes. She jumped into the television and ripped off Billy May's clothes. Billy Mays broke. "BILLY MAYS! BILLY MAYS! BILLY MAYS! BILLY MAYS! BILLY MAYS! BUYYYYYYITTTTTTNOOOOOOOWWW! THIS OFFER THIS OFFER THIS OFFER THIS OFFER! SHIPPING AND HANDLING HANDLING HANDLING SHIPPING HANDLING SHIPPING OFFFER!" Peach immediately put on a Santa Claus hat and ran to the phone to call Billy Mays to buy a "SHIPPING OFFER." Jigglypuff tore up all of Luigi's clothes except for his slippers and boxers, Luigi didn't notice and drove to Wal-Mart. The Wal-Mart Team took a picture of him and labeled it "TYPICAL WAL-MART CUSTOMAR". Jigglypuff tore up all of Captain Falcon's clothes except for his bra, his mask and his ballet tutu. Captain Falcon walked backwards to MCDONALD'S. Luigi came back. Jigglypuff now has ALL of everyone's clothes. She set a bush on fire and sacrificed all of what she considered to be her friend's clothes in the fire. "OH, PRAISE THE LORD!" She yelled out to Nintendo City.

Mario was still stuck in the dishwasher, Mario smelled something "It kinda smells like smoke." Mario's voice was heard everywhere. Everyone was embarrassed, even if they never wore clothes before, anyway.

Meanwhile, Spaceship Olimar was back, chasing Wario on his motorcycle near the moon. Wario was almost there. Spaceship Olimar wouldn't give up. It continued to hit Motorcycle Wario all around the universe, making him fall off the edges of things. Then they were both back on The Empire State Building and Wario rode his motorcycle off the edge of it, with Spaceship Olimar chasing him.

Link was thrown in prison by Washington, The Dictator of All That Does and Does Not Exist.


	7. HANK HILL'S TRUCK IS STOLEN

NESS GOES TO THE NIGHT SKY SCHOOL AND HANK HILL'S TRUCK IS STOLEN

Ness wanted to learn. He decided to go to NIGHT SKY SCHOOL. Mario immediately fell out of the dishwasher. Mario takes Ness to The Night Sky School in his TRUCK that he might have stole from HANK HILL. Hank Hill began to chase them at full speed, but Wario and Spaceship Olimar ran him over.

1 Second later, Ness came back from school with a LOT of homework. He had to LEARN THE ALPHABET. So he went to ask Shower Luigi what the first letter of the alphabet is. Luigi said this in a deep, opera voice.

"IN THE TOILET. IN THE TOILET. IN THE TOILET, WE MUST GO ." Said Luigi, abruptly waking up.

Ness likes the alphabet. He decided to ask Chimney Kirby what the second letter was.

"OH, PRAISE THE LORD." Said Kirby.

Ness is happy. He decided to go ask Jigglypuff what the third letter was. Jigglypuff was playing Super Mario Galaxy 2.

"SHUT UP! YOU DON'T KNOW ME!" She screamed at Lubba, cried, threw her Wii Mote at the television set and threw a water fountain out the window and followed it to the night sky.

Ness ran to Peach, who was cooking hamburgers and noticed they smelled like smoke.

"MY BUNS ARE BURNING! MY BUNS ARE BURNING!" Yelled Peach as she made a run to her Mixing Bowl.

Then Ness heard Sonic run into the wall.

"YOU'RE TOO SLOW!"

Then he saw Meta Knight throwing Jonas Brothers CDs into the fireplace.

"ALL OF YOU CAN BURN IN HELL FOR ALL I CARE."

Finally, Ness went to Baseball Practice and Dr. Robotnik, his coach yelled "24 AND HIT THEM HARD!"

The Next time at Night Sky School, Ness's teacher told him to sing the alphabet.

"YOU'RE TOO SLOW." Said Ness.

"Not in particularly." Said The Teacher.

"OH, PRAISE THE LORD!"

"Hallelujah." Said The Teacher "Now hurry up, we only have The Night Sky's light to finish."

"SHUT UP. YOU DON'T KNOW ME." Ness threw his bat at his teacher and threw a water fountain at the window "ALL OF YOU CAN BURN IN HELL FOR ALL I CARE." Ness said as he ran out.

Then, the teacher's men dragged him back in the school and into the principal's office.

"WHAT DO YOU HAVE TO SAY FOR YOURSELF?" Asked The Principal.

"MY BUNS ARE BURNING! MY BUNS ARE BURNING!" Answered Ness.

"WHERE DO YOU LIVE?"

"IN THE TOILET. IN THE TOILET. IN THE TOILET, WE MUST GO."

Luigi was driving Ness home with a newspaper in his hand.

"How many times should I whack you?" Asked Luigi.

"24 AND HIT 'EM HARD!" Said Ness.

Suddenly, Spaceship Olimar crashed into Luigi's car and Olimar came running out, with Motorcycle Wario chasing him, then Olimar got out another Spaceship...and IT WAS ON.


	8. YUP YOU ARE BUSTED

CHAPTER 8 YUP. YOU ARE BUSTED.

"LET'S PLAY TRUTH OR DARE!" Yelled Peach.

She slam dunked her mixing bowl into the dishwasher and everyone except Wario and Olimar was sitting in a circle around the TEEVEE.

"Captain Falcon! Truth or Dare!" Asked Peach

"DARE!" Yelled Captain Falcon

"I DARE YOU TO GET CHIMNEY OUT OF THE KIRBY FOR ME, SANTA CLAUS?" Peach Said.

The Blue Falcon ran over Pichu, then the screen showed an F-Zero racing track with Pichu on it, then the Blue Falcon ran over Pichu. The Blue Falcon rode Captain Falcon Chimney to the then blasted the Chimney out of The Santa with the Kirby Claus hat on.

"I WANTED TO RUN OVER THE JIGGLYPUFF THOUGH :C" Said Captain Falcon.

Jigglypuff locked herself into the dishwasher with Mario and dyed her hair black, cried in the corner, cut herself, and wrote emo poetry in the corner.

"YOU DON'T KNOW ME, MAN." Said a Homeless Mario with a torn up Hobo hat and an old scarf and jacket said. Homeless Mario threw Emo Jigglypuff out the dishwasher, so she decided to try to get stuck in the chimney. She couldn't get stuck in it, which seriously annoyed Fireplace Meta Knight, so he threw Twilight Books at her.

"NANA, ARE YOU AND LUIGI ROBOTS?" Asked Popo.

Suddenly, Luigi and Nana ran into the laundry chute, landed in Kirby's cooking pot, then came out wearing computers and Radios.

Peach came dragging Jigglypuff from Meta Knight's private study.

"HI, JIGGLYPUFF. I'M YOUR NEW GIRLFRIEND." Said Peach

Jigglypuff went to the corner and continued to cut herself.

5 minutes later

"JIGGLYPUFF, WE'RE THROUGH!" Yelled Peach

Jigglypuff made the ":3" face.

Kirby was eating chocolate chip cookies on top of the TEEVEEE.

"How many cookies do you have left?" Zelda Asked .  
"Four." Said Kirby.  
"WHAT? FOUR and not FIVE?" Asked Zelda, in shock.

Meanwhile, Pichu, Nana and Popo were watching Ness throw gummies on the ceiling.

Luigi came storming up the stairs.

"Are we busted?" Asked Ness.

"YUP. YOU. ARE. BUSTED." Said Luigi, he rolled up his newspaper and began chasing the 4, he caught Them all, threw them all into the Laundry hamper...

Link had escaped from prison. Link was on his way back to Ganondorf's pub.

"So what would you like this time?" Asked Ganondorf.

"CHIMNEYYYYYYYYS :C" Said Drunk Link.

Up in The Night Sky.

Wario fell back down to the Empire State Building, landed in The HOMERUN CONTEST STAGE from Super Smash Brothers Brawl, then Spaceship Olimar followed him. Ganondorf's Pub went on a commute there, then Ganondorf and Link fell out the chimney. IT WAS A 4 PERSON BRAWL.


	9. KIRBY VERSUS PEACH AND KO'S DO NOT EXIST

Chapter 9 Kirby Versus Princess Peach and Nobody will ever be KO'd

Kirby was on a rampage throwing everybody into his cooking pot by clinging his knife and fork together as a sign to go into the cooking pot. Everybody except Peach, that is.

"No, no, no. I am the only one who is going to be cooking around here." -Peach

"Well, skinny cooks can't be trusted." Said Kirby as he pointed to his sign with a Fat Baker that said 'Skinny Cooks can't be trusted.'

"Well, you're getting into my Mixing Bowl, ANYWAY." Demanded Peach.

"Princess, this is a complete outrage!" Said Kirby "I am calling the Bakery!"

Peach pulled the phone off the cord, took one can of fruit punch out of the Refrigerator, tried it, didn't like it, flushed the can of punch down the commode, noticed it clogged the commode, took the can out, left the punch in the commode, flushed the commode, threw the can back in the commode, clogged the commode, then decided to leave a sign on the Commode Room that says "DO **NOT** USE COMMODE. GO UPSTAIRS. **NEVER** USE COMMODE. COMMODE DOES** NOT **EXIST." Peach surfed backwards while balancing on a Washing Machine and a Beach Ball on top of The Empire State Building. Then threw the phone into The Haunted Bakery. Then crawled in the middle of the busiest Highway in the universe back to her kitchen.

Meanwhile Jigglypuff was inspecting the house. Just because she is _so _caring. She noticed the sign that read "DO **NOT** USE COMMODE. GO UPSTAIRS. **NEVER** USE COMMODE. COMMODE DOES** NOT **EXIST." She ignored the sign, anyway. She entered the commode room. There appeared to be blood in the commode. Oh no! Caring Jigglypuff could not accept this. The only thing she said was " OH NO IT'S A BLOODY COMMODE!" yelled sweet Jigglypuff. She had to take action. She threw The Planet Neptune into the Commode. JIGGLYPUFF HAS SAVED THE DAY! She walked out of the room. She noticed The "DO **NOT** USE COMMODE. GO UPSTAIRS. **NEVER** USE COMMODE. COMMODE DOES** NOT **EXIST." sign. Oh no! It is a misleading sign! Something must be done! Jigglypuff tore down the sign and stuffed it into the water fountain, pulled the water fountain out, then threw it off the top floor of THE EMPIRE STATE BUILDING. Luigi replaced the sign. Luigi still had Nana, Popo, Pichu and Ness as Prisoner.

Meanwhile, Kirby and Peach were in quite some tomfoolery. They were throwing cooking utensils at each other while balancing on beach balls on top of The Empire State Building. That is, until the most outrageous thing happened. Peach smacked Kirby upright the face with a frying pan and he left a dent in the dishwasher. HOW COULD YOU KIRBY?

Hobo Mario was very grumpy. He fell out of the dishwasher and did backwards somersaults until he left a dent in Luigi's Great Newspaper Prison, making it break down. Ness and his friends were free!

Luigi couldn't stand this. He chased Pichu around in circles around the Empire State Building since _everything _is always Pichu's fault.

Suddenly Wario ran over an old Lady next to the Empire State Building on his Wario Bike. Wario was late for his Tourney with Olimar and Them at The HOMERUN CONTEST Stage.

"KIRBY, IT IS ALWAYS UP TO ME TO COOK THINGS AROUND HERE." Said Peach.

"THIS POT IS THE GREATEST MASTERPIECE EVER! YOU CANNOT DENY IT." Said Kirby.

This drove Fireplace Meta Knight mad. He got out of his Private Study and threw a Hannah Montana CD at Kirby. He turned around and left a sign on the entrance to his Private Study. It said " BE QUIET! AND GET OUT OF MY PRIVATE STUDY! PRIVATE STUDY DOES NOT EXIST! THE PRIVATE STUDY IS ONLY AN OPTICAL ILLUSION."

Kirby clinging his Knife and His Fork together was how Peach got stuck in his Pot. The Pot exploded and everyone landed on top of The Empire State Building. Captain Falcon put on his Santa Claus hat and rode his Blue Falcon out into Space.

Anyway, Ganondorf, Link, Olimar and Wario were beginning The Great Tourney. Wario rode his motorcycle about 69853035053 Light Years out of The Screen but was still there. Olimar was running around trying to smack people with his antennae while Ganondorf was beating him up. Link was stuck flying around The other side of The Universe and he still wasn't KO'd. It was time for sudden death! Everyone's damage was at %! Link Started by hitting Ganondorf out of the right side of the screen, at least 684567 Light Years from where he was supposed to be. Then Olimar knocked Link to another Universe by running his Space Rocket into him. Link wasn't KO'd, anyway. Then Olimar slapped Wario's motorcycle with his antenna and left a huge dent in it, causing it to break down. Olimar laughed.

"Haha...THOSE COST MONEY YOU KNOW!" Complained Wario to Olimar.

Wario grabbed a motorcycle, became Super Wario, and rammed Olimar to Where Nothing Exists. Wario went so fast, he went out of the screen, too. He jumped of his motorcycle and was turning around slowly. Ganondorf was out of the screen, doing Somersaults with his cape. Link fell out of the sky and decided to go attack Ganondorf. Wario was now twirling slowly around and he was UNDER THE SCREEN. Olimar was repeatedly ducking to dodge the nearby bob-ombs.


	10. LUIGI CONFISCATES OLIMAR'S SPACESHIP

Chapter 10 WARIO AND OLIMAR RETURN AND LUIGI CONFISCATES EVERYTHING

After a Tourney that lasted for Eternity, Wario rode his motorcycle on a Beach Ball on top of a unicycle on top of a Laundry Machine on top of The Empire State Building while Lively Big City Old Fashioned Music Played while Olimar rode Spaceship Olimar and played Pikmin on his Gameboy and didn't pay attention to anything else. About infinity Light Years later, Olimar crashed through the Roof and Wario rode his motorcycle down the chimney. Kirby came flying out of the chimney with a Santa Claus hat on. Fireplace Metaknight confiscated Wario's motorcycle.

"*Fake Laugh* THOSE COST MONEY YOU KNOW!" Said Wario.

However, Meta Knight immediately pummeled Wario with Twilight books until he was out of Meta Knight's Private Study. Meta Knight pointed out the " PRIVATE STUDY DOES **NOT** EXIST." Sign and slammed the door.

Meanwhile, Luigi confiscated Olimar's Spaceship and left dents in it with his newspaper until it broke down and exploded.

"NO! MY BEAUTIFUL SPACESHIP!" Olimar cried as he ran over to his broke down spaceship.

Wario immediately took out another motorcycle and rode it to the Nintendo City Mexican Dance.

Olimar immediately climbed into a New Spaceship Olimar and followed him.

Luigi was flabbergasted.

Jigglypuff was swinging Pichu around until she tripped on The Haunted Bakery and all The Mexicans cheered. Pichu was swung so far he landed on Luigi.

"YOU KNOW, THERE IS ANOTHER WAY OUT!" Yelled Luigi, because_ no matter what, it's always Pichu's fault_ !

_**The Grand Tourney**__**: **_Luigi and Pichu were shown balancing on Beach Balls balanced on Squeegee Janitor Mops balanced on Unicycles balanced on Laundry Machines on top of The Empire State Building.

_**Luigi's Turn: **_Luigi uses " Newspaper Abuse "

Luigi abused Pichu with a newspaper for 30 years.

Pichu took 9434346932 Damage.

_**Pichu's Turn**_: Pichu uses " Punch Down The Commode "

Pichu took one Can of Fruit Punch, tasted it, didn't like it much, flushed the can and the punch down the commode, noticed the commode didn't work, took the can out, flushed the punch down the commode, put the can back in the commode, flushed it, then left.

_**Pichu has begun staring at the dishwasher.**_

_**Luigi stared at Pichu staring at the dishwasher.**_

_**Pichu stared at Luigi staring at Pichu staring at the dishwasher.**_

_**Luigi stared at Pichu staring at Luigi staring at Pichu staring at the dishwasher.**_

_**Pichu stared at Luigi staring at Pichu staring at Luigi staring at Pichu staring at the dishwasher.**_

_**HOBO MARIO HAS BROKE OUT OF THE DISHWASHER AND WENT ON A RAMPAGE.**_

_**Luigi evolved into MR. L!**_

_**Luigi has entered Brobot and is trying to fly to The Moon!**_

_**Pichu has summoned Jigglypuff!**_

_**Jigglypuff uses Microphone!**_

_**Jigglypuff's microphone left a dent in Brobot, causing it to break down and explode!**_

_**Mr. L is Luigi again!**_

_**Pichu has evolved into Pichu because the writer of this story thinks Pichu is cuter than Pikachu. Yay!**_

Meanwhile, Link and Ganondorf were back at Ganondorf's pub.

"What will it be today?" Asked Ganondorf.

"ZAXBY'S!" Yelled Link.

"THAT IS A HOBO RESTRAUNT! THIS IS A HUGE OUTRAGE!" Yelled Ganondorf.

Suddenly, Link and Ganondorf fell out of the chimney and landed at a Zaxby's with a few hobos outside of it.


End file.
